It is impossible to manage our relationships well if we are not able to manage ourselves. It all begins with us. Our thoughts, emotions, desires and fears drive our relationships with people around us. Not knowing enough of this inner mechanism is the root cause of all our relationship problems.
How often do you face the difficulty of being misunderstood, of being underestimated, of being ignored? You rely on your relationships for your psychological and emotional support and yet the very relations you rely so much on, more often than not disappoint you. Let us understand a few fundamentals of successfully handling relationships. Let us understand how to balance the desires of our personal life with the expectations of the people around.
“You are responsible for your relationships”
First and the most important thing to remember about relationships is that you are the only person responsible for creating, managing and breaking-up relationships. There are no good or bad people out there worthy or unworthy of your relationship. Relationships are all about you. It is of course much easier to put people into categories of good and bad and shift the responsibility of managing relationships on to others. When things get difficult, it is always the other person who is wrong, isn’t it?
Managing relationships require a slightly different approach. It requires the approach of a warrior. A warrior who is willing to fight within himself for the sake of his relationships; a warrior who is willing to first recognize and identify his own negative feelings and emotions towards people and then go about fighting them.
It is said that the greatest battles are fought in the deepest recesses of our hearts. It is truer in case of the relationships we handle. Managing ourselves amidst of endless maize of complex and different behaviors is the greatest of all battles.
Own it; take the responsibility for all your successful and failed relationships. Face the fact that everything that has gone right and wrong with people has happened because of you. The moment you throw the blame game out of the window, you become responsible; which is the first and most important requirement for managing successful relationships.
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